Where the matrimonials websites and columns are not the first place to seek life partners from, they are definitely not the last. Even if you’re not looking forward to getting married soon, you might just want to go through such advertisements for a good laugh (especially when you’re having a bad day)!
1) You have to get married: Yes, married! Haven’t you noticed the age mentioned in all those *wonderfool* matrimonials? There is no way out. Marriage is a must for everyone at a particular age and that age isn’t the age you want to get married at but the age which the society approves of.
AND, If you’re of age (If others think you’re of age) then think of good reasons to save yourself from the traumatic talk if Bittu’s mummy (creepy aunty in the neighbourhood) or Pinky’s granny take more interest in you than your own family. “Beti ko ghar mai kab tak bitha kar rakhoge?” (Till when will you make your daughter sit at home?)
Bittu’s mother and Pinky’s granny keep an eye on everything. EVERYTHING! The time you wake up at. Whether you cook your own meals or not. Do you know how to cook at all or not? The time you leave for work. The kind of ‘revealing’ clothes you wear. The way you walk. The time you come back home.
Hello kid! You’re being monitored. Alert mode on. There. There. Things are not right there. You might just want to run.
How many women have you seen get married after the age of 35? Not many I suppose. Don’t we all know the answer to that? Where it’s fine for a man to get married after 40, it’s the complete opposite for a woman. After all, the fruit is going to get wasted if it’s not eaten when ripe! There are already too many people with their bibs on .
2) Parents know it all. Do they? Parents know when to strike the right chord. Surely they do. They outdo us each time, don’t they? If Daddys cannot explain things to us or win arguments, Mommys can surely live upto their reputation of pulling up those brilliant “emotional” dramatic performances. They’re definitely charged with hormones. :P Only women can get such things right.
Remember how your parents go through the matrimonial section, their eyes glued on the paper? Well, that’s something to worry about. Your parents might be just preparing to pull off another great performance. ;) Somebody is in action and you have very little time to counter their “beti ki umar ho gayi hai” arguments.
3) Education is a key. Is it? Education plays a very important role in our lives and one of the biggest role it plays in today’s time is also when one gets married. Have you ever noticed how the groom’s family demands a “convented” girl? Well, convented is not a word, it’s convent educated. :P
Either someone is trying to save money in those advertisements or they have no idea about the difference between the two. Groom’s education gone to waste? Wasn’t he convented too? Oops. I haven’t ever seen even one advertisement that mentions the educational qualification of a man.
4) Body type: If you exceed the specified body type then OMG you cannot get married. You have to be slim, fair and beautiful. I don’t know who decides the notions of beauty but I surely do know one thing, I am not a racist and that’s the reason why I do not judge people based on the colour of their skin.
Somebody needs to ban those fair and lovely advertisements. Also, a woman has to be slim and NOT FIT! Well, the body type of a man does not count. Does it?
4) Money does matter because apna sapna money money: Another thing in these matrimonials is the kind of money one earns, only a woman earns. Ironic, isn’t it? After all, the money will belong to the groom’s family. “Sarkaari naukri wali ladki mil jaaye to kya baat, private sector wali tez hoti hai” (It would be excellent if we find a bride with a government job since those with private jobs are very clever). Doesn’t this highlight how people hunt of highly earning brides through these matrimonials?
A lot even specify that they want someone who earns more than 7 or 8 or 9 or 10 lpa. The never ending list on display!
5) Caste System dividing us all? How do people generally look for a suitable partner? Well, the caste divide is prevalent in these advertisements too.
There are various sections under the Brahmin, Kshatriya, Vaishya and Shudra category and then there are other sub categories. Seems like relationships are on display in the market and one needs to buy them keeping the caste biases so deeply grounded in our minds. Can we even imagine that there will a day when everyone will be an equal, irrespective of one’s caste?
6) Question on Sexuality and Virginity: A woman’s virginity in question is not a new thing. Is it? The matrimonials do not openly demand Virgin or brides who have still not bled (hymen intact) for the grooms but do it in a very subtle manner.
They use the term cultured and not many pay attention to its usage. What’s confusing are the notions behind being called cultured or not. Who are these rule makers moral upholders of the society and where they do they disappear when a woman is subjected to domestic abuse, violence, marital rape and other dowry related issues?
Well, some people do end up getting compatible partners through these matrimonial websites. One simply needs to be on the lookout and also careful of those creepy stalkers.
You might just get lucky. :)
Views presented in the article are those of the author and not of ED.