Karan Johar, who has mostly been tight-lipped about his private life, opened up about the fact that he hasn’t been getting much sex and that he is content with his situation.
He talks about some very relatable issues where at his young age he didn’t know anything about sex and his parents were too shy to talk about it to him. This is where I guess all of us identify with him.
I am sure we all have faced such a situation when an ‘intimate scene’ comes on the television and it is either us or our parents who have to make an excuse to go and have some water. Why? Because it creates an awkward situation that we find difficult to deal with.
When the primary source fails, we turn to other sources of information and end up getting misinformed because often they are not reliable. That engenders bizarre myths regarding sex.
The 41-year old also had a hilarious one. He was told by a bunch of classmates that blow job means “to take off all your clothes and lie on the bed with fan on full”. And then he proudly went about telling his friends that he had a blow job everyday!
The romanticisation of sex and intimacy that we see in movies and advertisements has a lot to do with our perceptions about sex. Now that might be a major reason screwing our imagination because sex in reality is “often clumsy, sweaty and sloppy and not always that sexy” and things don’t really happen like they are written out of a movie script, he says.
This leads to a distortion of the reality and we find ourselves not matching those standards that we see. Consequently, we do not feel comfortable with our bodies and are in a state of denial.
Johar hilariously busts phrases like being “good in bed”. He says, “For me, good in bed means sleeping for seven hours. Undisturbed! If I get eight hours, that means I am amazing!” Well, if that is true, I am sure so many of us are beyond amazing!
He is not claiming himself to be a saint or rather a Brahmachari. A part of him indeed wants to “embrace it, enjoy it and know what the fuss is all about?” But he believes that will only follow love. He prefers the quiet moments of intimacy and the beauty of a kiss more than the act itself.
Haven’t we all been part of those conversations where people are prurient in talking about sex and all what’s great about it and how people who are not getting enough of it are missing out. Indeed sex is great! But why to feel that you are missing out on something?
Well, through this catharsis, Karan might liberate a lot of other people from their shells who might be afraid to say this aloud. It is okay to feel “unsexy” and “nervous”.
He asserts that he is not chasing sex anymore, unlike his 26-year-old self where he ticked it off his bucket list after a polite “thank you” to his partner.
He feels good being in the place he is. Because it’s okay! “Victoria may have a Secret but you don’t have to know it!”
There is no fear of missing out. It is the acceptance of missing out.
Well done Mr. Johar! We definitely need such bold and bluntly honest views to be shared by people like you, so others know they are not alone!
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Views presented in the article are those of the author and not of ED.